Robert Mueller

Trump Aide Tells Mueller Where to Shove His Subpoena in Defiant Rant

While the rest of the nation is humoring the misguided Mueller team, former Trump Aide Sam Nurnberg isn’t having it.  At all.

There was a moment during the 2016 presidential election in which you could sense the fear within Hillary Clinton’s team.  The Podesta gang, bolstered by a millennial army of miscreants, believed that they could simply hitch a spot on the Obama express, and ride the rails directly into the Oval Office without incident.  After all, Hillary Clinton believed that she had it all going for her.

Not only was Clinton a democrat, lining up nicely with 8 years of Barack Obama wearing the conductor’s hat, but she had his full endorsement as well.  The man was a living myth among democrats: A new JFK, or some similarly profound statement that someone on the liberal side of things would utter.  Hillary also had one enormous advantage over everyone else in the field:

Hillary Clinton was a woman with no shame.

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Clinton leaned so incredibly hard on this sheer, biological fact, that the more astute political commentators were forced to tiptoe around the hypocrisy of her stance on the trendy transgender takeover of popular culture.  If Clinton was the right person for the job simply because she was a woman, how could non-women not take this to mean anything other than female superiority?  Especially in this newly hyperbolic world of imaginary genders and an expanded language that has served to handcuff the national narrative to a lie.

Yet, Clinton persisted through this nonsensical dichotomy simply because she was Hillary Clinton.  A woman scorned by her husband in the most humiliating and public of ways during his own failed presidency, who was now rising like a progressive phoenix from the ashes of, well, her own career.

In many ways, Hillary Clinton’s doomed White House run was her own rebirth, her own straight-to-Netflix rehashing of her previously controversial time at the State Department.

Clinton was destined to lose the election of 2016, thankfully, due to her undying corruption and the lazy disguise that she had attempted to hide behind.  While acting as Secretary of State, (no slouch of a position), Clinton played loosey-goosey with the law on more than a few occasions, with a particularly self-centered decision to forego national security protocol in order to hide her emails from the prying eyes of the NSA.  This endangered the lives of a great many Americans, especially those overseas for whom Clinton was expressly and explicitly responsible for while assuming the role of Secretary of State.

As it turns out, Clinton’s need for this secret email server, and her subsequent deletion of 33,000 or more emails from it using high-level destruction software, were due to her “pay to play” scamming of the entire State Department.

While the American people stared these issues in the face during the 2016 election, it became clear that Hillary Clinton was a liability for the nation.  Her recklessness was unkempt and catastrophic, and there was no way that the American people were willing to gamble like that with their Commander in Chief.

As Clinton grew explicitly aware of this fact, she grew desperate.  She grew infatuated with winning, for her, not to do well by the American people.  Her inexcusable frothing at the mouth performances during the national debates were unprecedented messes for which she would often be forced to address in the media shortly after.  During one debate in particular, Clinton retroactively blamed Donald Trump for “stalking” her on stage, and contributing to her poor performance.

This asinine allegation insured one YouTube user to provide us with a golden nugget of humor.

Of course, the simplest solution here was the correct one:  Donald Trump is a businesses whose skill sets include an aptitude for ready body language.  Trump was simply engaging his opponent in such a way as to remain cognizant of their emotional state.  This was a contest, after all, and Trump is a winner by trade.

This “stalker” debate was about the time that Hillary Clinton began to snap.

Her health had been deteriorating for months, with a number bizarre coughing fits dominating the daily briefings regarding her press events.  Videos were abound on the internet of the former First Lady being helped up and down staircases of all sizes…including some as small as two steps.

Then, as we approached that fateful day when Clinton got “the vapors” and passed out during a somber moment at the 9/11 memorial in New York City, the former Secretary of State dropped the bomb:  Donald Trump was a Russian agent.

Well, that was where we ended up.  Clinton originally began by insinuating that Trump didn’t dislike Vladimir Putin as much as she did, as if this calm and collected demeanor was somehow harmful to international diplomacy.  The absurdity of her statement would have been reamed in the punditry had it been uttered by anyone other than Hillary Clinton, who, at this point, was clearly grasping at straws.

The theory snowballed into an avalanche of absurd claims of Russian interference into the election itself, the American media, the Trump transition team, and more.  Suddenly, the left, led by Hillary Clinton, was pushing for an investigation into these purported relationships.

Enter Robert Mueller; ex FBI head honcho and friend of the democrats.

Mueller has been at it for months, digging so far into the Trump campaign that he’s now beginning to bring charges that will surely bring down the president!  Right?

Not exactly.

Mueller’s near-year of work has very nearly nothing to show for it, lest you want to count a couple of procedural crimes being committed unrelated to President Trump whatsoever.  Still Mueller presses on, leading his fishing expedition into ever-wider deltas and marshes, traversing the D.C. swamp with the zeal of a true denizen of the muck itself.  Truly, if Mueller succeeds in providing a “win” for the democrats here, the stench will be noticeable from as far away as Philadelphia or Richmond.

Those in the know have been defiant of Mueller, and with good reason:  There is no telling what the former FBI chief is even looking for at this point.  Stories from within the investigation paint a picture of a man desperate for something.  His “spray and pray” method of investigation is growing tiresome, however, and the pushback is coming in earnest now.

Take former Trump aide Sam Nunberg, who just today told Mueller right where to shove his subpoenas.

“In an interview with The Washington Post, Nunberg said he was asked to come to Washington to appear before the grand jury on Friday. He also provided a copy of what appears to be a two-page attachment to his grand jury subpoena seeking documents related to President Trump and nine other people, including emails, correspondence, invoices, telephone logs, calendars and ‘records of any kind.’

“’Let him arrest me,’ Nunberg said. ‘Mr. Mueller should understand I am not going in on Friday.'”

Oddly enough, Nunberg’s angst is not only with Mueller, but with Trump as well.

“’The Russians and Trump did not collude,’ Nunberg said. ‘Putin is too smart to collude with Donald Trump.'”

As if that isn’t clear enough:

“’I’m not spending 80 hours going over my emails with Roger Stone and Steve Bannon and producing them,’ Nunberg said. ‘Donald Trump won this election on his own. He campaigned his ass off. And there is nobody who hates him more than me.’”

That’s a bold strategy, but it’s one that is indicative of the growing worry among democrats that nothing worthwhile will come of their imbecilic investment in Mueller.

In the meantime, at least there is something interesting to report on in the #RussiaGate investigation, given that all of Mueller’s previous moves have been met with completely inconsequential results.

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