infrastructure

Pizza Purveyor Paves Potholes As Domino’s Disses D.O.T.’s

The federal government of the United States is quite the spectacle at times, and something to be proud of every now and again…but I wouldn’t suggest holding your breath in between those delightful instances.

In fact, there is a fairly valid argument out there that the federal government has never truly improved anything that they got their hands on.  The reasons for this range from the insanely simple to the overwhelmingly complex.

First and foremost, the federal government cannot give the sort of local attention to detail that is required in certain aspects of society without bloating itself to the point of inevitable corruption, not to mention the uncouth burden on taxpayers that this becomes.  And, furthermore, when the federal government finds itself in a bipartisan urination competition on Capitol Hill, we end up shutting down the government at the drop of a hat.  When the gates on those National Parks close, it isn’t only affecting the revenue of the Park Service, it’s also putting citizens local to the park out of a job.

On the very local-est of levels, government scaling problems can become fairly apparent.  Think about potholes, for example.  On the highway, they may be under the jurisdiction of the state or even the federal government, but on a city street, it’s going to be up to that city to handle them.  And what about those long county roads out in the rural parts of our nation?  Are those jurisdictions clear enough to make for a timely repair?  It’s not likely.

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That’s why a new advertising campaign by Domino’s Pizza is irking some lawmakers, who see it as the pizza shop taking a pot shot at government ineptitude.

Domino’s Pizza is helping cities fix potholes to provide a smoother ride for the driver delivering your pizza.

The pizza giant’s PR campaign also serves as a public service because damaged roads neglected by the government tear up your food as well as your car.

“Potholes, cracks, and bumps in the road can cause irreversible damage to your pizza during the drive home from Domino’s,” the promotional website reads. “We can’t stand by and let your cheese slide to one side, your toppings get un-topped, or your boxes get flipped.”

“So we’re helping to pave in towns across the country to save your good pizza from these bad roads.”

The ad itself is fairly clever.

If your city is in desperate need of pothole help, Domino’s has even set up a way to be considered for their next paving project.

And, while this is ultimately hilarious, we would be amiss if we didn’t mention how sad it is that a pizza company has a better Department of Transportation than our nation does.

It reminds me of when a soda company’s space program outshone NASA on the world stage.

 

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