global warming

Einstein and NASA Come to Wild Conclusion About Global Temperatures

While the entirety of North America currently undergoing a cold spell that would make Boston’s hockey fans think twice before heading out, the left is still talking about global warming.

Well, technically, they’re calling it climate change now because the rest of the waking world came to understand that there’s no way the world is actually warming.  Their hope is to hold onto the liberal eco-guilt demographic through the certainly chilly 2020 presidential election.

The idea of “climate change” is so abstract that it can truly mean anything.  Extra wet winter?  Climate change.  Extra dry winter?  Climate change.  Stronger Hurricanes?  Climate change.

The list goes on.

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Trending: Science is Settled

In order to push this bizarre concept on the rest of the world, the left led a three-pronged attack by employing guilt, politics, and the cult of celebrity.  They needed to deftly combine all three of these in order to stifle the science that almost unanimously declares them quacks.  In fact, due to sun cycles, there is a good chance that we’re headed for a new, mini ice age thanks to the Maunder Minimum.

Now, a new corroboration of science giants is once again bringing proposing the idea that our planet is getting cooler, albeit for entirely different reasons.

“As our sun gets older, it’s losing mass, and so its gravitational pull becomes weaker. As a result, the orbits of all the planets in our solar system are expanding, not unlike ‘the waistband of a couch potato in midlife,’ according to a new NASA press statement.

“A team of researchers from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, the University of Maryland and the NASA Goddard Space Flight Center has shown that the aging sun is behaving according to Albert Einstein’s theory of general relativity. The key to testing his theory? The planet Mercury.

“Einstein’s famous theory accounts for the fact that the gravitational fields of huge objects—like the sun—warp the space-time continuum around them, according to Gizmodo. Because Mercury is the planet in our solar system closest to the sun, its orbit is the tightest.

“’We’re addressing long-standing and very important questions both in fundamental physics and solar science by using a planetary-science approach,’ Goddard geophysicist Erwan Mazarico said in the NASA statement. ‘By coming at these problems from a different perspective, we can gain more confidence in the numbers, and we can learn more about the interplay between the sun and the planets.'”

While there is little doubt that the expansion of the universe happens on a scale of eons, this shrinking of the sun’s mass will send the earth to cooler, further orbit from our sun, thus cooling the planet indefinitely.  And possibly into a mass extinction some millions of years from now, completely negating the idea that this planet will burst into flames because we like to drive fast.

Checkmate, liberals.

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