The Department of Defense, whose job it is to blow stuff up, has apparently decided it would rather defend the Earth like Captain Planet against the evils of pollution caused by all that military stuff.
To that end, it has put out a call through the Small Business Research Innovation agency for bidders on a contract for bullets that not only biodegrade, but that will plant seeds if they miss their target.
Allegedly, this notion was thought up by career military people concerned about the tons of shell casings, grenade fragments and other junk that tend to litter the ground after a massive firefight. (Bodies apparently aren’t a concern as they are already biodegradable.)
The Department of Defense adds that it’s important the seeds produce plants that are edible — in other words, crops — by local wildlife … such as ISIS troops, one would assume.
Do you ever get the feeling that 6-year-olds are in charge of the brainstorming process at the Pentagon?
“And, um, then they can make a bullet that, um, when it kills, kills somebody, it takes their blood, their DNA and clones it and makes them alive again, but they are on our side now. … Can I have ice cream?”
Biodegradable bullets that plant crops.
Bio … degradable … bullets … that plant … crops.
BIOdegradablebullets … that plant … CROPS.
YOU CANNOT HEAL THE PLANET EARTH BY SHOOTING IT!!!!!
That is all.