North Korea

Kim Jong Un Goes Even Further Off Deep End With Assassination Conspiracies

The ferocity in which North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un thrusts his insanity upon the world has increased tenfold in recent weeks, as evidenced by the latest news out of Pyongyang.

The diminutive despot is somehow still clinging to the ridiculously absurd idea that one day, he and his technologically quaint military, will one day wipe the United States and her allies off of the face of the earth with a massive, coordinated nuclear assault.  The imagery of these fantastical assaults have adorned many a display concocted by Kim and his cronies, while reality has offered up an entirely different possible scenario:  Ain’t gonna happen.

The whimsical ramblings of Kim Jong Un notwithstanding, the North Korean propaganda machine keeps chugging along, even as the rest of the globe has been slowly finding their rhetoric less and less entertaining, yet more and more serious.

Now, the latest cockamamy theory out of Pyongyang tells of an intricate plot by a North Korean defector, turned by the United States, armed with nuclear-nano-something-or-other, attempting to assassinate the “supreme leader”, Kim Jong Un.

“North Korea has accused the US and South Korea of attempting to assassinate leader Kim Jong Un with a ‘bio-chemical substance.’

“In an extraordinary 1,800-word report Friday, which offered no evidence other than account laced with fantastical language, North Korean state news agency KCNA said a ‘hideous terrorist group’ conspired with the CIA and South Korea’s Intelligence Service (IS) to mount the attack.
“Its aim, the report said was to ‘commit bomb terrorism targeting the supreme leadership’ during major events including a recent military parade.
“KCNA laid out the alleged plot in great detail, saying it was hatched in 2014 when the South Korean and US intelligence agencies recruited a North Korean working in the timber industry in eastern Russia. Further contacts were made over subsequent years, and the assassination attempt was to have taken place at a military parade, KCNA said.”
“The report claimed a North Korean citizen was involved in the plot, using ‘biochemical substances including radioactive substance and nano poisonous substance’ to target Kim.”
Again, these are likely nothing more than the irrational ramblings of a delusional dictator, raised on wild conspiracy theories and a God complex, that serve no purpose other than to galvanize the North Korean people against the United States, who have been poised and ready to engage the rogue nation after weeks of provocation.
The only way that Kim could find himself in an even stranger predicament than the one he invented, would be if he were to successfully test a nuclear weapon.  In that case, a very real attempt on his life would likely be made by the United States.
In either case, it may be just about time to get out the popcorn.

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